As parents, we are all aiming for the better development of our children but in some instances, we are so oblivious that the little words we are saying become the ways of the resentment and uncertainty to invade their mind. There are lots of words that our mouth unleashes every moment but are we aware enough for their impacts on our children? And what are these words and phrases we should avoid?
This is the first thing you should avoid that is quite obvious why. If your child to grow up in good way, you should show them the good things and not the bad ones including this. Always remember that your child can imitate whatever you are doing. You can’t stop your child from cussing if you used to do it.
Words of Comparison
Well, these are the phrases that always start with “Why can’t you be more like your sister/brother/that kid?” This is the thing that often causes the sibling rivalry among the children in every corner of this world. Of course, we all want our child to be that good girl or boy but we have to admit that slapping in their faces that their younger or older siblings are the ‘models’ whom they should base their acts with is something that is quite unhelpful. In fact, in saying these phrases, we are just making great fire among them that could start a serious problem that they will carry up to their, if possible, adulthood. Instead, why don’t you try to focus on what your child has? How about that?
“You never” or “You always”
In handling our children, we must always expect that there will be those times that we will be infuriated but saying these phrases is too much even if they did a great mistake. If you would say these words, it is as if you would make a pay back three times greater than what they did. How do we say so? Well, it is because saying these phrases is like saying “You are nothing but just a piece of blah blah blah…” It will be stuck in their mind that they are unable to do nothing or anything than what they can do now making them like a prisoner in a stagnant place.
“I told you…”, “Because I said so…”, and “That is wrong! Let me do it…”
We used to say that we have lots of experiences and that we know a lot of things than our children. Well, this is quite true but pretty risky too for it may turn us in a self-centered persons. Saying these phrases can mean “I’m always right and you’re always wrong” and that is a thing you should avoid. Our children need a boost in their self-esteem and we shouldn’t take it for granted. So, instead of putting all the credits to you, try to recognize their acts no matter how small it is and if they did something wrong, try to have a talk to your child while avoiding getting close to the concept of “I am always right”.
There are other words and phrases we should avoid and we really have to develop a keen observing mind for those negative things. Yes, it is quite hard to keep an eye in each of our acts and words but everything will be easy if we will always have this thing: an understanding heart for our children.